“The mind is a powerful place"1 (NF The Search) I hear you. The mind is powerful and scary. I'm battling my mind right now. It is telling me that I need to revert to coping mechanisms that I've used for decades...and I don't want to do that. So am I weak if I need to … Continue reading The Mind

Do you ever sit there and trace a line you’ve drawn?Try to conjure up a feeling you have known?Maybe think about the past and want to repeat, Shudder at the thought, but fear it’s meant to be.I don’t understand the pull, the attraction; Why sometimes I feel I am called to action;To plunge into the … Continue reading Darkness

“You're running, aren't you...”It's not a question she's asking.And it hurts you, though youconsider the source. “You’re running, aren’t you…From what I’m not sureBut now I’ve got you”Consider the source. Don’t let them get youYou’re so much stronger After all you’ve been through Consider the source. This is another try toKeep you rooted in placeAnother … Continue reading Consider the Source

You know what sucks? It's having a big sensitive heart. It's giving so much of yourself...and getting nothing in return. Because you forget...not everyone feels or expresses themselves the same way. It's expecting something...when you damn well know your expectations are too high. You set yourself up for a letdown. Stop it. Stop counting on … Continue reading Smallish Vent

I feel like I'm spiraling out of control. My mind can't stay focusedit's on overload.stimuli coming from every directionlittle noises and voicesdemand my attentionMy neck is pulsing and feeling tightconstricting and restrictingI'm not alrightI just want to feel alive again,going through motionsforeign in my skinMy thoughts are disconnected from mechasm between my mind and bodyI … Continue reading Empty

Just Be Held...gosh the opening lyrics speak so loudly to me right now. I had literally just sat down and opened a new document to write. Plugged in my earbuds and the first words hit hard. Not what I had in mind to write about either... but signs... "Hold it all togetherEverybody needs you strongBut … Continue reading Just Be…

Do you ever feel like everything you do is wrong? It doesn’t matter how hard you try or how much you do, it’s never good? I just feel like everything I touch turns to rust... I feel like everything I try to do falls flat. I’m feeling like a failure right now. And I really … Continue reading Pausing, Not Stopping

The last time I saw him, he recognized me. His face lit up, eyes cleared, said my name with such excitement and struggled to hug me... And quickly fell back asleep. He’d been sleeping much of the time lately, as is what often happens. And I had planned on seeing him this morning... But GOD … Continue reading The Last Time

It's not a thump,it's more like a poundingmy chest starts to bumpin my ears, resounding.I look down to vieweach time my heart beatshow my shirt movesso obvious to me.and the bass in my earseven as loud as it iscannot drown out what i hearnearly brings me to tears.Eyes burn red hot,close them to hide from … Continue reading When Troubles Crowd