Sometimes the walls start caving in and there’s nothing we can do except curl up and wait…
We wait for the walls to move, for us to be able to breathe again, for our lungs to fill, our eyes to dry and our voice to return.
Sometimes holding on is all we can do…we pull our knees to our chest and rock back and forth and hold in the sobs or let go of the moans…
Life is a balancing act of holding on and letting go.
It’s not always easy knowing what to do when…many times fear directs our paths: we’re afraid of being alone or afraid of being with the wrong one…
We’re afraid to keep going forward yet afraid to break down and cry.
Fear keeps us moving onward or keeps us firmly rooted in place.
Of what are you most afraid?
Let me simplify something for you: you can be surrounded by people who love and care for you, and still feel alone. You can be by yourself and have no one yet lack for nothing. It’s all in what you make of your circumstances. Because in the end, we are all alone.
No one will be there for you every step of the way. The only exception to this rule is if you are a child of the KING. HE, the LORD, GOD ALMIGHTY, is the only one who’s approval you need and the only companion who will never leave, forsake, abuse or mistreat you.
Everything and everyone in this world is temporary; don’t sweat the small stuff.
By the way, with the exception of GOD’s love, mercy, and grace, everything is small stuff.
Let. It. Go.
OneFourZeroPM 
This hit right to the core of one of my internal battles. I’m afraid of walking the rest of this life alone with someone to share things with and to love. I know I’m never truly alone and it’s supposed to be enough that He is always with me but I still miss having a companion.
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I get that. I think it’s normal to feel that way. We’re not meant to walk alone. We are meant to have a help-mate walk with us.
However, I feel like if we are obsessed with trying to find ‘the one’, we miss out on THE ONE who matters. (Not saying you’re obsessed)
You can argue with me because I’m married and I don’t understand…but I can tell you that I wasn’t looking for marriage or even a relationship when that happened. I never was the type to need someone with me. And even now, I do a lot by myself. Even together, I still feel alone.
And that was my point…we all are guilty of seeing relationships from the outside and saying how good it is or how bad, but we really don’t know. From the outside mine looks flawless but I assure you that it is not. It’s painful most of the time. And this post is a reminder that everything that tears me up doesn’t matter. The things that I cry myself to sleep about will one day be insignificant. Not only that, but I also wonder how much that upsets me is really the thing or just my reaction to something. Am I being ridiculous for letting something hurt me so much, or are my feelings valid…?
And getting back to finding someone to share your life with, it will happen when you stop looking. The small stuff that we fret over takes our attention from our blessings. I am guilty of this too, but I need to focus on my blessings and not the small stuff that vexes me.
I hope nothing I said is amiss. The last thing I ever want to do is hurt anyone.
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Just because you are married now doesn’t mean you don’t get it. Your words are ones that I’ve read and say to others all the time. It’s so much easier to give it than live by it. I’m sure you get that too.
You’re right I’m not obsessed. Obsessed would require me to actually be looking or even putting myself out there and I most certainly am not. Because while I do want a partner I also am fearful of bringing someone around my children. Plus Im kinda old fashion. We need to be on the same journey or he needs to be ahead of me so he can lead.
I have started recently with fasting and prayer to see the things in life I was missing. Many of your posts have helped me do that. Im also reading more of the word which is giving me some much needed peace.
As always thanks for the posts and conversation
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It’s like we’ve both said, we need the constant reminders, mantras, all that and we need each other’s help. We need the encouragement and the gentle criticism when we slip…
I do believe when GOD’S timing is right, you’ll find the one who’s meant for you.
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