Negative Relationships

So I was thinking about a response from one of my earlier posts… And the comment was about relationships and how we spend time with those relationships and it really got me thinking we spend so much time on negative things how we miss out on so much good.

I realized that the things I spend the most time with are not necessarily good for me. I spend more time with negative relationships and developing those relationships and feeding those relationships than I do with the positive ones with the with the people who help me be a better person. And it really put things in perspective. I’m tired of wasting my time on so much negative.


Think about it: we dwell so much on things that bring us down.


We relive the moments that cause us pain.


The fights…


The reprimands…


The guy who cut us off on the interstate…


The lady who cut in line at the checkout…


The kid who made us spill our coffee…


The traffic light that made us late to work.


All those things that we complain about are taking up so much of our time and energy. We don’t have an unlimited amount of either of those.


We need to stop feeding the negative stuff and things taking up valuable real estate in our lives.

Let go of those bad relationships.


Stop feeding them.


Stop watering them.


Stop giving in to the devil.


You know he’s behind our suffering.


Don’t let him have the upper hand.


Yes, I fight the darkness.  Every. Single. Day.


And it is a hard battle.


I’m not going to win every skirmish.


But I’m also not giving up.


I’m going to win the war.


And it will be a lifetime of fighting.


I will have days that I give in; I will not give up!


We can’t give up.


While I never want to be a role model, I know that there are people who look to me for guidance. I cannot let them down.


And I’m counting on you to help me and to walk this path with me.


Together, we can accomplish so much.


Together, we are strong.


You are not alone; we are in this together.

2 thoughts on “Negative Relationships

  1. Why do you think we do that? Is is because subconsciously, we take for granted good relationships or smooth situations? Are we naturally drawn to bad things to fix them, even if we know we can’t? I think knowing why we zoom in and focus on those will help us to cope and not foster those negative feelings longer than necessary.


    1. I think we take for granted anything good…but maybe because we feel unworthy…? For example, I can have 99 positive comments and one negative comment about me or a post, and that one negative comment is what I’ll remember.
      I think we crave positive things, but we don’t know how to accept them, or give them, really. From my childhood, I remember being told over and over that I wasn’t good enough, didn’t try hard enough, all that. I never heard that they were proud of me. To this day, I still try and feel I fail them. So I try extra hard to tell my children I’m proud of them and that they are enough and have surpassed me but what they remember even now is when I come home after a stressful day and I comment on the one thing they forgot to do instead of everything they did.
      And that breaks my heart.
      No excuses, but I wonder if we are hardwired to focus on negativity…and getting back to the one bad comment out of 100, I’m more apt to believe it for truth because I feel like I am a failure.
      And I’m only speaking from my point of view.
      As far as being drawn to bad situations to fix them, I don’t know. Maybe we do try to impart some good or maybe we are seeking validation. Maybe we invest our time and energy to be a martyr of sorts…?…because we are trying to fix the broken parts of ourselves? The only way to fix ourselves, though, is to leave the darkness alone. No, we’re not perfect and we need some negativity to keep us humble, but be humble and compassionate; we need to balance the positive and negative so we don’t stay in the darkness longer than necessary.
      Short answer to your question, I think we are trying to fix ourselves because like attracts like and the things we are drawn to are the things we relate to…maybe subconsciously, but we feel like if we fix ‘it’ we’ll fix something in ourselves.
      I could be completely wrong. These are just my thoughts…


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