Trying to Hide

I wound myself in a tight little ball

Tucked away in a corner against the wall 

Folded in on myself I feel so small

I see my chest rise and feel the tears fall. 

I’ve sunk so far and did it again

I’ve taken the razor and shredded the skin

Trying to let out what I keep within 

I’m so ashamed that I gave in. 

I don’t even know can’t even see

I’m in a dark place shadows holding me

This is where I belong where I should be

The light is gone; I made it leave. 

I rock back and forth; can’t control the sounds

It escapes from my lips and echos around

I feel at home here on this cold, cruel ground

I am lost in myself, not to be found. 

This is where I go, deep inside my mind

Where it’s cold and dark, no light to shine

I cut myself open with whatever I find

Make myself so small, I try to hide. 

I want to go away to stop hurting myself 

I hate that I lash out and hurt everyone else 

Just let me be, leave me alone with myself 

My life has dimmed, the light I had just left…