I just want peace.
I’m so tired of fighting…
For everything.
It’s a constant.
This never ending battle…
Within myself.
And not just me.
Internal and external…
Fighting ensues.
I fight for speech:
For just a chance to be heard…
If only once.
I fight for space:
For a little breathing room…
To be myself.
I fight for peace:
War rages behind my eyes…
And in my heart.
I cannot grasp-
Thoughts and feelings, words escape…
Without forming.
I am empty.
A wasteland, desolate place,
War torn wreckage.
I just want peace.
Need just a little relief
Little reprieve.
I sit and think.
The words whisper and scream, yet
The cursor blinks.
OneFourZeroPM 
Is this irony? Writing about not being able to write? Or frustration over not being able to write the words you want to write?
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It’s frustration about not being able to make my thoughts coherent. There is so much friction, so much fighting, so much strife and I cannot quiet the voices or noises or distractions so I can concentrate on my thoughts. I stare at the blinking cursor and my thoughts flow but the words don’t meet the page.
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I’m still working on techniques to quiet the noises. I feel like this post is the sequel to your post I’m a mess. I don’t know how to process or what to do from this point but I do recognize my situation in these posts. Again, I don’t know what to do from or with the pain.
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I don’t know either. I just know that I am so tired of feeling like I’m in a constant struggle. This post is frustration. It is not being able to articulate what I think and not being able to form coherent thoughts.
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How do you grow if you can’t articulate your thoughts and feelings?
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Allow yourself to feel. Have the the thought, have the feeling, GOD sees and knows all things…let HIM see and hear and know that that is enough.
You are not alone. Some of my thoughts, I don’t WANT to articulate. Those I tell GOD ‘YOU know my unspoken thoughts and feelings, please help me and move them or cause me to move in YOUR way.’
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