Trying so hard to be what we’re expected to be, often we lose ourselves.

i wish you could tell me just who i am

i wish you could tell me so i’d understand

i try and try to be all that i can

now i’m lost, i throw up my hands

i’ve twisted and turned; conformed to the mold

lost all inside me; my insides ice cold

slipping and sliding, i’ve lost my hold

struggling to do just what i’ve been told

i’m yelling and screaming, kicking the air

pulling and tugging, this isn’t fair

making a scene, but no one is there

does it even matter? no one really cares

i need relief; i’m begging for help

can you hear me, as i yell?

did you see me, as i fell?

all i know is i hate myself

spinning round, arms stretched out

lost my focus, fall to the ground

pretending to be, something i’m not

i turn to you, you’re all i got

you turn away, leave me be

you said you wouldn’t abandon me

said you’d always be here for me

truth is what i now see

you never cared a thing for me

i know i’m messy; emotional

i’m borderline dysfunctional

i don’t like to get personal

but life with me is magical

i lost myself to be your fantasy 

i changed to be everything you’d need

twisted myself into your daydream

given up on my sanity

when i thought i passed the test

you took off; you just left

ripped my heart right outta my chest

best parts of me gone by theft

i’m taking back what you stole

i’m building myself back up whole

recognize me not; its a new mold

in with the new out with the old

Everything is still spinning, but this time you’ve lost control of me. I’ve found myself and I’m taking back everything you stole.

spinning round arms stretched out

laughing now as you shout

you don’t recognize me now

you don’t see, don’t know how

realized i don’t need you now

i won’t change; i won’t allow

straight up, leave no doubt

taking back what you stole

building myself back up whole

recognize me not; its a new mold

in with the new out with the old

3 thoughts on “Spinning

  1. You can see the new you even want the new but how do you stop spinning and embrace it. How do you get your mind to truly accept the new. The old is so powerful and has so many memories attached.


    1. I think it takes a lot of work and determination. It’s not easy. There are times when we slip but we must keep going. We didn’t fall overnight; it will take time to rebuild. Be patient with yourself. Love yourself.


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