Why do I do this?To myself?Put my heart out there?On a shelf?Just bleed it out?On the page?Bare my mind and soulCenter stage?Everything is nothing.It’s all naught. I’m a shell of a human,An afterthought. See the lines I cut?On my skin?See the lines of pain,Show again?The burn, the shame,Agony?No man, this isn’t that,No pity. I did this for you,By … Continue reading A Request
Tag: #depression
Exhale
I exhale slowly,Focusing on the task,Of taking in air,Hold it, then relax. The exhale gets me,Sometimes i forgetTo just let it goSo I can reset. I’m lying to you. The exhale isn’t slow,By violence is forced;I have no control. A fist to the gut,A vacuumed sealed room:The exhale ripped,An impending doom. I can’t do this,I continue to say,As I exhale … Continue reading Exhale
Why, Man
You know I’m hurting. I told you I was on the edge.What? You say “I’m sorry”,And leave me on the ledge. What the hell, man,I thought you were hereBut now I see, they’re wordsEmpty sounds for me to hear. I’m in pain, man,I feel like I’m dying. I wish I was dead, man,What? You think I’m lying?You haven’t checked … Continue reading Why, Man
Mastermind
Watch me as I orchestrate,A universe of strife and hate. I pull the strings and let them go.Move the pieces along just so,Bending them against their willPushing them further still.I’m subtle in my determination;No inkling my goal is devastation.My puppets are bound by stringsThat to the eye remain unseen.They are completely unaware-They are trapped in my … Continue reading Mastermind
The Dark
It’s almost like I can’t breathe This feeling suffocating me A darkness surrounding me Caressing and enveloping me. I can’t see it, but I know This grip won’t let go, Elusive yet steady hold, Willing me to lose control. Just give up, give in Let the darkness win, There’s no rest when This fight doesn’t … Continue reading The Dark
Late Night
I read somewhere that people shouldn’t talk about their healing process. That recovery should be done quietly. I guess I understand on some levels where that would be beneficial. You don’t discuss your plans, you just do them. When you want to get ahead at work, you do it, you don’t tell everyone what you’re … Continue reading Late Night
Unclear
Empty, hollow, Like a never ending echo,Reverberating off the walls; Indistinct and unclear.Head pulsating,Rhythmic and methodical beats,Vision dancing at rapid speed Indistinct and unclear. Shake this feeling,I can’t seem to make it through this,My life is quickly becoming Indistinct and unclear.
Depression
It’s a lump in your throat (Well, maybe just where it starts)That plummets to your gutAnd back up to your heart. Like you swallowed something Something bitter and vileAnd you just want to purgeAnd you spit out bile. No matter how much you heaveHow much comes outThat lump is still there Growing bigger, no doubt. … Continue reading Depression
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